The day the Nigerian “Big man” was humbled – Peter Obidike

I heard something today that made me feel good, I can’t help but share. If you know of the Nigerian slang “Do you know who I am?” then you will connect to the story and trust me, this time around we knew who he was!!

So this “Big man” arrived at his kids prospective school gate, armed as usual with three mobile police men and expected to be greeted “as usual”. Alarmed that the gates were not thrown open to welcome his “Excellency”, the mobile police men got down from the vehicle to justify their pay. They went straight to the gate and demanded the gate be opened so they could usher in their Lordship. Unfortunately for them, they met their match in the well trained unarmed security guards who told them the rules of the game, “no magamaga here oh, if we are not expecting you and you have no business here, you are not going to enter into this kingdom.” As his Excellency saw that his orderlies couldn’t swing that one, he had no choice than to get down from his car and approached the gate to be attended to. Since he was the one who came looking for them, he had to follow the rules. When he entered the school gate, he got more than he bargained for and that made him even more furious. All visitors must wash their hands before they enter the premises irrespective of whether you came with MOPOL, in a convoy or not. I pitied the guy as this got into him the more but he had no choice but to comply. After the washing of his hands the next thing we saw from the CCTV was a visibly angry man who stormed out of the gates with his orderlies.

The proprietor was all this while watching the drama from the CCTV feed and on seeing the last episode, he quickly called the security officer to enquire why the man dashed out. It turned out the man came all the way to the school to find out when the entrance exam to the school will take place and when told it had already taken place, that he would have to wait until the next year, it was more than enough insult he could take from these people who obviously “do not know who I am” and probably do not care to know!

And one could not help understand why this “Big man” who attached so much importance to this choice of school that he had to drive all the way down, will not ask Google the simple question or even ask his kids friends who I’m sure will all know about the entrance exams. It’s like being a “Youth Corper” (Nigerian National Service, after high school) and not know when the next bank or oil company will write their recruitment test.

This one served him right if you ask me. I wished that school in Abuja where one politician went to beat up a teacher had the same control. Maybe, by the time he had finished washing his hand he will have no guts to breach the peace of the school and attack a teacher who is giving up other opportunities to take care of his ward. I guess you know the politician am talking (abi na writing?) about? That one who collected four hundred million and has not answered Magu’s questions “nau”. What is wrong with you “sef”? I mean the one who they took in a stretcher to the court the other day because the Judge will not believe in their lies of falling sick only when asked to come and answer to how they squandered our common wealth. Nnnaaaa, “iwu ishi aki oh” (you are a block head oh”). The name starts with “M”. If you cannot decode that one then I cannot help you “biko” (please). Like I said in “My Apologies” I do not have the balls to call them out like my friends do. I can only speak in parables.

Suffice it to say that the Nigerian “Big man” is arrogant and in all that arrogance you will think that there is something in his coconut head but when you look very well, you will see that there is nothing there and all the “magamaga” is to cover up for his ineptitude and ignorance.

A real man is humble and does not need all the policemen in this world to guard him because he has not hurt anyone and is not afraid of any. A real “Big man” understands that every individual knows only a little of the things of this world and hence has the humility that comes with knowing that you know only a small part of the whole.

My prayer is that the Nigerian “Big man” learns his lessons from within and not wait to be embarrassed outside.

Obidike Peter wrote from www.peterobidike.com and p_obidike@yahoo.com